As I was walking down the preschool hallway with my three year old and her friend David, we saw three little girls who instantly stood up and practically sang ‘Hi David.’ David is a really good looking kid who is funny, smart and happens to be my daughter’s best friend. Although he heard the girls, he didn’t really care and mumbled ‘Hi.’ My daughter on the other hand said ‘Hi guys!’ in a very friendly manner. Only one of the girls responded while the other two glared at her (her being my daughter).
Although I found this to be really funny, I have to admit that I wasn’t really ready for it. I expected this kind of competition among girls to start around junior high – not in preschool. So my question is how do I deal with it? I like to think that I raise my daughter to be nice to everyone regardless of their looks and popularity with others. I also try to teach her to have confidence in herself so that when she’s older she is able to handle the pressure that she’s going to have to deal with as a teenager and then as a woman. What I don’t know is how to go about teaching her about competitive girls.
At some point she will have to face girls who feel incomplete if they are not the smartest, fastest, prettiest, most successful, richest…. I just hope that she doesn’t lose herself or someone else to the competition game like I did. My best friend of sixteen years and I are no longer speaking because her competition addiction turned into jealousy and caused all sorts of problems. I don’t want my kid to have to go through that.