I had struck up a conversation with a woman at a friend’s house last week about a bracelet she was wearing, but the conversation took a turn when she started to discuss her marriage to an older man. I have to admit that I was taken aback by the fact that her husband was 20 years older than her. When I think of marrying an older man, the idea just doesn’t appeal to me. Especially if I was just born at a time when he was almost done with college. Although he may be charming and successful, an older man has already lived through and experienced so much more than the young woman that he’s with. On the other hand, there are lots of women who date older men today so I tried to understand Bianca’s reason for marrying an older guy.
According to Bianca, marrying an older man is the best thing she ever did. When you’re in a relationship with an older man he not only respects you more, but he listens to you and goes out of his way to make you happy. He puts your needs before his own and shows affection openly. When you’re in a relationship with an older guy, he takes you to nice dinners and buys you nice (not to mention expensive) things. In Bianca’s case, her relationship started because she was beautiful and he was financially well off. Somehow, love came into the picture later on and they got married.
On the other hand, there are things that should be done by a young woman who is in a relationship with an older man. She must take care of herself and look good at all times. She should be very supportive of her man, shower him with compliments and above all make him feel young and energetic.
While Bianca had some great points, I still wasn’t sold on the idea of marrying an older man. More and more today you see young women dating older men so I know that she’s right in her argument. After all, what women doesn’t want to be showered with gifts and attention? But what of the future? When you first marry an older man, everything may seem normal, but will you stay around when he’s 80 and you’re 60 and he has a hard time keeping up? Will he want to keep you around when you’re 40 or leave you so that he can start dating younger women? In other words, will your relationship be affected by age?
At the end of the day, I think that I would be a little weary of my daughter started to date an older guy. If they love each other that’s one thing, but if it’s for the money, I wouldn’t be happy about it. I would prefer she marry someone that’s closer to her own age that she can learn with, grow with and live to be old and grey with.
How do you feel about marrying a much older man?